I was cleaning my bedroom today and I found a box of mementos I had stashed away. It had some cards in it. Some were from special friends and some were from dead realities. The one card only had my name on the cover nothing else. I opened it and read the note that was hand written inside. It was for me to have a wonderful year with lots of joy, and at the bottom were the words LOVE ALWAYS before the senders name. I felt like crying. The dictionary defines always as : 1. every time; on every occasion; without exception. 2. all the time; continuously; uninterruptedly. 3.forever. When I got the card with a very thoughtful Christmas present 2 years ago, I believed the words written on it. I trusted what was there to be the true feelings of the writer, but apparently always like so many words today does not still mean what it once did. Apparently love always now means I will love you till you disappoint me, or until you make a mistake that hurts my feelings. Always must now mean until you prove yourself to not be perfect. Always now must just be words on a page without any part of it's true intent.
I myself do not say love always or that I will do anything always often, but on the rare occasion that i do use the word always to me it means till the end of our times on this planet. I will not turn on someone that I have said love always too no matter what kind of idiot they make of themselves. When someone says love always and just a short year later they shut you out and throw you away like you never mattered to them, chances are you never did and they were only talking to hear themselves when they said it. I would much rather someone not sign a card love always if they did not really mean it. It could have been signed sincerely, yours truly, or even just from instead of love always, sense the words were not meant why write them in the first place.
Look i am sorry if I am bothering anyone with my thoughts, but I get my feelings hurt easily,and sometimes I just need to write about it. The bitter irony of this is the person who really should see this blog probably never will, because over a year ago just after my birthday the writer of the card blocked me from sending them pms, Their always was about 2 years time till they said I will never talk to her again Apparently a never again is stronger then a love always. That is good to know.
That is another way to find out who your real friends are. Real friends will forgive in time if they really loved their friend. I have another friend who I cut out of my life about 3 years back, and we are back to talking again. The relationship is not as strong as it once was, but it is on the mend. Anger, hurt feelings and disappointment can not totally erase a trues love always, but it can injure it. Real love is stronger then anything, but it must be real and not just lip service or just something to write at the end of a letter, one must mean it when they say it.
